5-Tips to Master Non-Violent Communication
Conflict resolution is a difficult skill to master. Especially in the context of romantic relationships. It requires a variety of skills and including but not limited to high levels of self-awareness, ability to recognize and tolerate uncomfortable emotions, the courage to stand up for what you need while simultaneously empathizing with, understanding and considering your partner’s needs. It also requires a social tact and the ability to communicate said needs in a way such that your partner will receive them instead of encouraging defensiveness.
Moreover, it is just as much of an art as it is a science. Effective reactions are different from situation to situation and from person to person. Having said that, here some guidelines for “fair fighting”. Implementing these strategies will increase the chances of resolving conflict in ways which maximizes both people getting their needs met, and minimizes damage to the relationship.
1.Approach conflict with a spirit of collaboration instead of competition
Our culture often perpetuates the idea that when there is a disagreement, there must be a clear winner and a clear loser. It is a zero-sum game which you can win only by proving that your partner is “wrong”. This approach is completely counterproductive because it invites us to act in behaviors and conflict-resolution styles which damage the relationship, which ultimately results in both people losing.
